A composer and guitarist who's missed to this very day.

Glad to see this site is out there -> https://steveclarkguitar.com/

Sigh - so ends another vacation.

I didn't get everything I wanted done. But I did get a lot done -

• Wrote some new songs.
• Recorded lots of guitar, bass, drums and keyboard parts for songs.
• New music for future songs.

Wasn't able to get much done with vocals. I have to finally accept that I'll need to set up some sort of acoustically-treated booth of sorts to do that.

Still much more to do. It's a journey. Sometimes I wish I could do more. Sometimes I wish I had started this much sooner (though I remind myself, the technology to do what I can now, didn't exist back then).

Who buys the weapons in your neighborhood?

In your neighborhood?

In your neighborhood ... yeah!

Who buys the weapons in the neighborhood?

The Arab and Euro genociders each day!

Sing it with me!

Time for a vacation.

I'm owed many comp days for all the late evenings, overnights,  and weekend work.

How asking for it in this day and age can be like a cancer diagnosis. 

But we'll see what I can get done.

1st day of Spring.

I can't say I did too much. But still ...

Got an expensive bill paid. Talked to a few old friends.

I'll be taking some much-needed time off, so we'll see how much I get done in both music and blogging.

Fucking Duh. I've been saying ever since it happened that Kurt Cobain didn't kill himself.

Turns out I'm not the only one.

https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime/kurt-cobain-may-have-been-murdered-new-report-claims/ar-AA1W5zoi

Kurt Cobain died on April 5, 1997 at the age of 27 in his home in Seattle. The cause of death was ruled to be a self-inflicted shotgun wound. Now, almost three decades later, a new report suggests that Cobain was murdered, with the perpetrators forging a suicide note.

"There are things in the autopsy that go, well, wait, this person didn't die very quickly of a gunshot blast," said independent researcher Michelle Wilkins. "The necrosis of the brain and liver happens in an overdose. It doesn't happen in a shotgun death."

Burnett and Wilkins propose that Cobain was drugged against his will, causing a death by heroin overdose. The killers then allegedly shot the rock star and made the scene look like a suicide.

 

Well I finally started.

Got my musical equipment at last.

It took awhile (and there's still a ton to learn), but I was able to create something fairly fast, and in the way I want to do it.

Obviously it's going to take some time - as well I'll need a new desk.

More to follow on that soon.

It finally arrived.

That is, the next-generation sequence/sampler - the AKAI MPC Live 3.

Now I have a huge learning curve, on both the multi-expression pads, and the new MPC 3 workload.

A great deal indeed, but hopeful for what it will lead to.

Well a reprieve.

No not from work. Nor from all the other unpleasantries in life.

No the next stage in what I want to live to do, is about to start.

It's a case of waiting for some things to arrive, and then begin going down the path.

RIP MTV (1981-2025).

Shutting down after today. 

End of an era, especially for Gen X and beyond. 

2025: End Of Year Thoughts.

Well, if I had any qualms about what 2025 would be like, they went out the door fairly fast.

This was one year I wasn't ready for.

Perhaps ironically, it drove me to start this post earlier than normal.

However rather than doing things as I usually do, I'm going to approach this in different way. Just write out a few thoughts and leave it at that.

If I had to choose a word that best described 2025 for me - it's LOSS.

Lots of things and people came and went in 2025.

Loss of famous musicians. It's weird to think that bands like Black Sabbath and KISS will never ever be now. I guess that's a part of life, but even then it's hard to fathom. 

In many ways for me however, it all starts at work. The loss of so many friends and colleagues over the course of several months, hit me really hard.

This isn't to say or suggest that I worship either the people I work with or my employer. But aside from family, it's the longest I've ever been in one place. So when you get to know a lot of people over a fairly long period of time, and many of the people exit - it can really do a number on you.

Getting up and going to work (that's a whole other story) isn't the same.

Walking through the front door and sitting at a desk isn't the same.

Focusing on your job and missing critical people who help you in your job isn't the same.

In so many ways I've known that a job is a job, and to an employer, that's all one is. But due to all the layoffs, I really feel it more. And based on the reasons for hit happening, I know that it's really only a matter of time before it happens to me as well.  

Along with this, came an apparent loss of respect. By this I mean that I finally know now that I'm truly not very highly regarded or respected by anyone at work - rather I'm only tolerated because of the group I'm in, and that this role wasn't one worth considered transitioning over to a service provider. This is a reminder to me (like it or not) that I have to come to terms with the idea that I really need to make the transition out. There are really only three possibilities -

• Transition to a new role internally
• Transition to a new role externally
• Transition to a new vocation completely

Yeah, good luck on any of those in this environment of endless job losses.We'll see where that goes.

Then there's the loss of people around the world.

The ongoing genocide of brown people largely by white people (i.e.Israel's genocide crimes against the Palestinians) is a reminder to me to that we as a species are heading down a path with no return. If we collectively cannot stop one group of people from destroying a whole other group of people (and recognize that the underlying system that allows this - neo-liberal US Crapitalism -is the source of many other ills in the world, including colonialism, imperialism, fascism, etc) - then how to we stand any chance of stopping the largest threat to all of us - climate change?

I did make some progress music-wise. 

Actually completed writing 10 new songs this year. I wrote an additional few extra songs, with many more ideas (chord progressions, riffs, lyrics, melodies) lined up. The thing is, this all came at a loss - I HAD to focus on this because I lost my main equipment for writing and arranging. And to make things worse,  the replacements for them won't be arriving any time soon.

One good thing I did get out of all this, was I was finally able to finalize on a way or recording that actually will meet my basic goals.

It's funny how losing a critical piece of technology actually forced me to adapt and use older and less pristine equipment; such that I was able to be both creative and productive.

Lastly, there has been the loss of trust.

It took me long enough to realize that there are some people in my life that are consciously and actively looking to sabotage my goals and wishes - by any means necessary. Often times it comes in the form of sowing doubt in me, or simply telling me what I want to do is a waste of time. In other cases, it's about stony silence and lack of engagement.

The discovery of all this has been painful for me in many ways. It's a tough thing to realize that I'm regarded and treated as nothing more than a living paycheck; who gets up early to avoid traffic, work early and late and weekends (the latter of which I think, was one of the reason I am still employed), only to hand all that over in a paycheck to be spent into nothingness with no care in the world. And then to be otherwise marginalized, or simply not taken into consideration. It's even worse when one's ideas and thoughts and wishes are dismissed, derailed, de-emphasized, or simply ignored altogether.

But ... what I have learned throughout all this is ... that none of this will sidetrack me on what I want to do - why?

1. My happiness is something I can achieve - I don't need to find that elsewhere. And I certainly don't need to find it in others.
2. Don't take things personally and emotionally from others - even if (and especially even if) that's how it's intended.  

All that bullshit and drams is just that - bullshit and drama designed to distract and deflect and prolong and project others' and their unhappiness and inadequacies onto me. And that it truly is up to me to move forward. In this regard, the seeds of that plan are slowing being planted now. Now it's time to be patient, stay focused on delivering on the day-to-day things, and being polite and professional.

When those seeds begin to sprout, it's up to me to nurture them,and make it grow. None of what these people do will hold me back from my happiness. And now that I know who and what they are - I won't let them.

Prologue

Well I said I'd do something different, and here it is. This whole year, loss has been a theme; and with that comes sadness. I think of sadness as our way of coping with loss, as a means of finding a way forward on our own. I spent a lot of time on the road and by myself. One positive output of this, was listening to lots of different kinds of music. This one particular song really touched me, because it contains many elements of the way I'm looking to make music in the future. But as well, emotionally, the tone, the notes, the scale, the instruments (heck the basic chord progression) really helped me cope and continues to do so.

So I'm posting it here - perhaps if you are experiencing loss, it can do for you what it has for me.

 

 

Eurovision 2026 can go fuck themselves.

https://peoplesdispatch.org/2025/12/05/public-broadcasters-quit-eurovision-2026-over-participation-of-israel/

Public broadcasters quit Eurovision 2026 over participation of Israel

Broadcasters from at least four countries plan to exit Eurovision 2026 after the European Broadcasting Union decided to allow Israel to compete.

December 05, 2025 by Ana Vračar

 

So long Ace Frehley - rip

Truly one of a kind.

Thank you Ace.

The question isn't whether I want this.

https://www.akaipro.com/mpc-live-3.html

It's whether it will really work for me.

I would certainly like it to.

End of my last vacation. End of Summer.

For me, Summer ends when kids go back to school.

But that aside, got lots of outdoor time (hopefully more to still come), finished some songs, wrote music for a few more.

Back to work soon. But for now I'll enjoy the time I have until Tuesday. 

My top 5 favorite rock records of the 1980s.

Attributes - 

• Heavy Drums 
• Punchy Rhythm Guitar sound/great riffs
• High melodic vocals and harmonies 

Some caveats -

• Records are in English.
• They may have a lighter or pop song on them, but overall, they are both heavy and hard.

Without further ado (and in no order), here they are - 

5. Eliminator - ZZ Top

4. Reckless - Bryan Adams

3. Appetite For Destruction - Guns N' Roses

2. Hysteria - Def Leppard

1. Back In Black - AC/DC 

 

What do you think? 

Happy Sabatoge Day.

That is, Happy 50th Birthday for Sabatoge, by Black Sabbath.

On July 28, 1975, “Vertigo” label released “Sabotage”, the sixth Black Sabbath studio album. It was recorded February – March 1975, at “Morgan” in London, and was produced by Tony Iommi, Ozzy Osbourne, Geezer Butler, Bill Ward and Mike Butcher.

https://musicalphabet.com/2025/07/28/black-sabbath-sabotage/

RIP Ozzy.

The original voice of Heavy Metal has finally met his maker.

Thank you Ozzy for being that voice, for so long. 

My next vacation comes.

Or really less of a staycation.

Let's see -

Doctor's appointments, dentist appointment, driving people to and from their work or their appointments.

It's gotten so there's barely any time to take a piss in between it all.

But despite taking some time off about a month ago, I'm actually looking to level-set on a few things and get my musical endeavors in order.

 

Realy eye-opening video about the music business, and the American Black community.

So many dimensions and layers behind this. It may take more than one view.