3 things I've learned about myself as I get older.

Call it being a man, call it getting getting older; take it whichever other fucking way you like it -

1- Never disrupt a man when he's in the bathroom.

2- Never interrupt a man when he's eating.

3- Finally, never awake a man who's asleep unless it's an emergency.

Failing to follow this will incite anger and retribution.