Hot Dogs.

Yesterday evening, I came home and found a magazine that contained an article about the ‘best hot dogs in America!’

Okay.

Normally I don’t try to pay attention to such things – who the fuck wants to hear the ramblings of a bunch of overweight fatsos talking about the joys of a meat product likely made of animal internal organs - as well as those clean assholes - wrapped in a bun likely loaded with tons of high-fructose corn syrup - but something (okay likely psychological marketing on the part of the magazine publisher) compelled me to read the article.

What a waste of time that was.

For starters, all the pictures of the hot dogs looked like a sausage, a bun, and like each reviewer threw up on them to ‘dress them’.

Secondly not a single mention was made of the condiment ketchup. To me, this is a revealing trait. It shows what snobs these people really are.

Now I’ll be the first to admit that eating meat with something sweet isn’t always very appealing. Okay one exception is sweet and sour spare ribs, but that’s it!

But there’s something to be said about ketchup. Yes it’s sweet, but often times I find it provides a nice balance to the injected flavor the sausage usually have in the hot dog. For me it’s very similar to why I have ketchup on a hamburger.

Things like relish are usually way too sweet and too strong in flavor such that it overwhelms.

Maybe I’ll try mustard along with ketchup on my next hot dog.

But cheese? Raspberry mayonnaise?

No thank you.