Can you ever really go home again?

People ask this question of themselves all the time - I'm no different.

I grew up on Canada. Originally I spent my early years living in a very big city, before ending up in the suburbs. Though honestly, the town I lived in was exactly that - it was a small town that existed on its own long before being designated a suburb.

Anyways ...

I lived in a part of the country where my language at home and at school was English, but in a city and province where French is the majority. When I was a kid I hated learning other languages, including my parents' native one, as well as French. Looking back, I think it wasn't the languages, nor even the idea of learning, but rather being forced to do something where I'd rather do something else. The other aspect of it was, I'm essentially a non-competitive person. I don't like engaging in games or contests with  other people. At the same time, I don't like being a loser in someone else's game. So combine not wanting to be there, plus always being made to feel like an idiot for not learning as fast as others, made life even more frustrating.

Of course - I should be thankful I can complain. After all, I did have a roof over my head, food to eat, a bed to sleep in. My parents - despite having their issues - were neither drug or alcohol abusers, and while they were violent, there kids I knew who had it much worse. But getting back to my diatribe ...

I made my career so far in IT. It wasn't what I wanted to do in life, but I realize that it's given me the life I have, and it does provide for me the opportunity to pursue what I want to do. Looking back, had I tried to do what I wanted from the beginning in that environment, the chances of me succeeding would have been a lot less, than where I'm at now, where I still have my ideas, my dreams, and slowly, the means to make them happen.

I'm really to start making some of that happen now. The question then becomes, if I achieve my goals and am able to reap any benefit from it, would that mean I'd move back to where I grew up?

Yes - it'd mean going back, but on a different set of levels. I'd be going back on my terms, on my success, and - assuming my dreams come true - with a bit of notoriety and respect. And where I lived is still a nice place, despite some family-related challenges.

I would consider it under those circumstances. So yes I could find myself going back, but not now. Not as I am presently.