Assholes

Somewhere along the way in life, I’ve learned something.

I’ve learned I don’t like people who act like assholes. There's something about being treated like shit in that I don't tolerate it. But that leads to a dilemma (more on that below).

Case in point, this weekend –

As someone who’s about to enter middle age and is perhaps starting to look it, I’m somewhat vain now about my appearance. And while I admit I never considered myself the most good-looking person in the world, in my mind, there were parts of me that made me feel good about myself. Now as I’m getting older, those parts of me are no longer looking very appealing – or rather they haven’t been for quite some time.

And while it’s nice to know that some people can ‘accept’ one for aging, it’s hard at times to come to terms with the idea that I'm never going to look as I once did. While in time I can probably accept what I'll turn into over time, the fact is, I have no real choice.

Where am I going with all this?

Perhaps it’s the day and age of the Internet that allows some people to be bigger assholes today than say perhaps when I was younger. But to the point –

I’m quite paranoid about people taking my picture – why? Because I think regardless of one’s age, I don’t think it’s unreasonable to want to have pictures that don’t show oneself in the most flattering light broadcast on the Internet for the whole world to see.

Some people just don’t get this.

Some people just don’t accept this.

The former are stupid. The latter are idiots. The various combinations I call stupidiots, which is basically another word for asshole.

On a recent excursion, I encountered a person who was continually in my face with a camera, trying to take pictures of me. This person would harass me into smiling for a picture and has done so for quite some time. When I refused, the person promptly began harassing me by taking candid pictures of me. One such picture was with my back turned (literally). When I turned around, another flash of the bulb.

And the best part of all this was the exclamation by this person after the last picture - "priceless!"

Suddenly the bells of recognition went off in my head. I've heard this all before.

I've heard this from someone else in my life who acted in a similar fashion - which is how I know to spot someone being an asshole.

Needless to say, I wasn’t amused. Within 24 hours, such unflattering pictures have now found their way onto everyone's favorite new portal to the Internet.


It's one thing to age and look a certain way only to have people around you see you as you are. I'm under no illusion of how I look, but it's quite another when just about every action you take (did I mention my back was turned?) is caught on camera and put online.

Yeah, this person knew what they were doing. They simply didn't care about my wishes. They seemed to enjoy walking all over my feelings, and in front of my family.

I find that disrespectful to me. I also don't want my kids to get it in their heads that it's either okay to treat someone that way, or that one should accept that when being treated that way by someone. That's bullshit and neither one is acceptable to me.

And, when you try to speak to them as one adult to another, and ask them to respect your wishes, only for their actions to essentially be a 'whateves - fuck you, i dont care what you want', what else is there to do?

Once again -

Some people just don’t get this.

Some people just don’t accept this.

The former are stupid. The latter are idiots. The various combinations I call stupidiots.

...

The thing is, one can spend every effort avoiding them, every effort trying to educate oneself on how to spot them. But is that the answer?

Yes.

Sure, there are assholes everyone in life - at some point one has to learn to deal with them- right?

Maybe I shouldn't be so 'sensitive' - as some have suggested. And, it gets more complicated when their lives are interwoven with aspects of your life, right?


Wrong - such people can fuck off.

Sure it's important to be a grown-up and act like one, even in the face of humiliation. People like that can choose to live their lives as they choose, until it affects me and my ability to take care of my family. You do your best to deal with them in a responsible manner, but if it screws with your life, you have to put your life and your health and well-being first.

In other words, don't be an asshole to yourself by allowing someone else to treat you like shit. That's something important I'd want my kids to learn.

I suspect this person probably wouldn't like someone like me constantly being in their business repeatedly taking pictures of them in their most candid, only to then publish all of it for the online world to view at their leisure, without any context.

In any case, going forward I'm going to take steps to ensure this person doesn't get the chance to do this to me again, or do so in front my family.

Be polite and be grown-up about it, but always stand up for yourself. In the end, who else will?